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Questions, questions. Just how many options does the SNP need?

 Er, just how many questions is that again?  Once upon a time independence was a simple matter – you just asked people whether or not they agreed that: “The Scottish Government should negotiate a settlement with the government of the UK so that Scotland becomes an independent state”. That’s how it was  in the original … Continue reading

The St Andrews Day Cringe.

The world is dancing to a Scottish jig today, or so we’re told. From the 12th Annual St Andrew’s Ball in Baku; the Kirkin’ o’ the Tartan’s Scottish gathering in Sydney; and on to Java where “a Scottish Ceilidh Band will stir all to their feet with the finest ceilidh music to be heard east … Continue reading

Peace in our trams

Peace in our time!  Combatants in the long-running Edinburgh tram wars are negotiating a Christmas Armistice.  The Council is promising that Edinburgh’s Princes Street will be cleared by next week.  Rejoice!  Rejoice!  Citizens have been out waving saltires and offering their daughters to the flourescent liberators mopping up the remains of the German resistance.     It … Continue reading

Why is Labour only Labour when it’s losing?

    Following the Queen’s Speech last week, I have informed my bank manager that I have passed a private members bill to abolish my overdraft within four years.  Having entered into this solemn and binding commitment with myself, I feel sure that he will grant my request for unlimited additional borrowing in the mean time.  … Continue reading

Could Labour win?

A nagging worry is keeping Labour MPs and ministers awake at night. It’s not the expenses row – they’ve gone through the pain barrier on that already. It’s not the prospect of a hung parliament and having to do a deal with the Liberal Democrats – they could live with that – or even the … Continue reading

Divorce – the Belgian way

You wonder how Belgium can be bothered having a national question. Does a country this small really need a velvet divorce? You can drive across it in a couple of hours and hardly notice you’ve been there. And despite two years of constitutional upheaval, Belgium certainly doesn’t look like a failed state. Travelling between picture … Continue reading

Glasgow North East was a disaster for the SNP.

With twenty twenty hindsight, everyone seems to be saying that Labour were always going to win in Glasgow North East: 74 years, in the blood, a monkey with a red rosette etc.. That the result tells us nothing about the political condition of Scotland on the eve of the most important general election in a generation. Well, … Continue reading

Brown’s Tobin tax bombshell.

   Shake me, I must be dreaming.  I could have sworn that Gordon Brown just called for a “Tobin tax” on international financial transactions to curb the excesses of the banks and  provide funds for developing nations and climate change.   Can’t be true, surely.  I must have nodded off, somewhere.      This is … Continue reading

What about the homeless ducks?

  But what about the ducks?  Has anyone thought about them? It’s all very well cutting MPs expenses, but what about the mallard  community, deprived of shelter at this crucial time of the year.    As the duck houses of Britain fall into decay and disuse, we face a major scandal of homeless ducks, geese, coots, … Continue reading

Black holes – some are blacker than others

It was a good week for black holes.  On the day that another £25 billion was poured into the black hole outside Edinburgh formerly known as the Royal Bank of Scotland,  the Auditor General.  Robert Black, forecast a £3 billion black hole in the Scottish budget over the next three years.  The latest mega bung … Continue reading

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